Domestic abuse affects people regardless of their gender, age, or sexual orientation, yet the experiences of male victims are often overlooked and underreported. While domestic abuse is commonly associated with women as victims and men as perpetrators, male victims-survivors of domestic abuse face unique challenges such as societal stigma, a lack of support services, and a heightened sense of shame and isolation.
In the UK, statistics show that one in six to seven men will experience some form of domestic abuse in their lifetime. The reality, however, is that these figures may be even higher due to the underreporting of domestic abuse among men. The stigma surrounding male victimhood, combined with a lack of awareness and understanding of the issue, means that many men suffer in silence.
Societal Stigma and Gender Norms
One of the primary reasons for the underreporting of domestic abuse among men is societal stigma. Traditional gender norms often dictate that men should be strong, stoic, and able to protect themselves and their families. This expectation can make it difficult for men to acknowledge they are experiencing abuse, let alone seek help. The notion of male victims-survivors of abuse often clashes with cultural stereotypes that portray men as dominant and women as vulnerable.
Male victims may also fear being labelled weak, unmanly, or even “less of a man” if they disclose their experiences of abuse. This fear of social judgment can cause them to hide their suffering, endure abuse in silence, or even blame themselves. For many, it takes a great deal of courage to come forward and admit that they are victims of domestic abuse, and this can result in prolonged emotional and psychological harm.
The Effects of Domestic Abuse on Men
The effects of domestic abuse on male victims-survivors are similar to those experienced by female victims-survivors but can be amplified by the societal stigma and lack of support. Men who experience domestic abuse often suffer from severe emotional and psychological consequences, including anxiety, depression, and post-traumatic stress disorder (PTSD). The trauma of being abused can lead to feelings of worthlessness, low self-esteem, and even suicidal thoughts.
In addition to emotional distress, physical injuries are also common among male victims-survivors of domestic abuse. While men may be less likely to report physical injuries from domestic violence, it is important to recognise that abuse can take many forms. Some men may face long-term health problems stemming from chronic stress or untreated injuries, as a result of abuse.
Furthermore, the impact of domestic abuse on men can extend beyond the individual to their families and relationships. Male victims-survivors may find it difficult to form or maintain healthy relationships in the future due to the trauma they’ve experienced. The abuse can also affect their ability to care for their children, particularly if they fear that their children will be taken away or that their parenting skills will be questioned due to their experience of abuse.
Barriers to Support
While there is growing awareness of domestic abuse in the UK, support services remain primarily focused on female victims-survivors. Refuge and shelters, helplines, and counselling services are often ill-equipped to handle the needs of male victims. This lack of accessible services leaves many men to face their abuse alone.
The lack of specialised support for male victims-survivors also extends to the legal system. Although the UK has laws in place to protect all victims of domestic abuse, male victims may not always feel comfortable accessing these services. There is a fear that their experiences will not be taken seriously, or that they will not receive the same level of support that women would in similar situations. This lack of trust in support systems can lead to further isolation and suffering for male victims.
The Need for Change
It is essential that the domestic abuse sector – and wider society – challenges the stereotypes and assumptions that fuel the stigma surrounding male victims of domestic abuse. Men need to feel empowered to come forward and seek help without fear of judgment or ridicule. Public awareness campaigns must be expanded to ensure that men understand that they, too, can be victims of domestic abuse and that there are services available to help them.
Additionally, support services for male victims must be improved and expanded. This includes the creation of more male-friendly refuge accommodation, support groups, and helplines, as well as more training for professionals in the domestic abuse sector to recognise the unique needs of male victims.
Finally, a cultural shift is needed to address the gender norms that perpetuate the idea that men cannot be victims of abuse. Educating the public about the reality of domestic abuse and the ways it affects men can help to reduce stigma and encourage more male victims to come forward.
Support
If you are a male victim-survivor of domestic abuse, support is available:
The Men’s Advice Line is for male victims-survivors of domestic abuse, offering confidential advice, non-judgmental support, practical information and help.
ManKind Initiative is a charity supporting male victims-survivors of domestic abuse through a helpline, directory of local services and general information on the website.
Domestic Abuse Alliance provides civil legal support and protection for anyone living with domestic abuse. The free to use WEPROTECT mobile app enables instant victim referral to ensure that appropriate legal support and protection is actioned without delay. Referrals can also be made online and we operate a telephone helpline for professionals and survivors: 0800 101 7110.
This is not an exhaustive list and there are likely to be local charities and support groups in your area that offer help and advice to men experiencing domestic abuse.
